"To a fly, I'm enormous."

"They've got wings! Some of them can fly!"

"If I had a urinal here I'd be having a good time."

"Ha Ha! Ill hide these in plain sight!"

"Bet theyd run a lot faster if Brett and I were chasing after them with Harleys and baseball bats."

"Alcohol Appreciation Major - Students who drink Guinness cannot take any 100 level courses."

"But in my opinion, you should stop sort of seeing girls and get yourself a maid with siamese eyes, a great body and make sure she's a nympho. That always helps."